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An early dismissal from daycare because of snow convinced my wife that there would be no afternoon nap today. And 99 out of 100 days, this would be true.
Then this happened.
First time for everything. Probably the last time, too.
A few readers were kind enough to send me this clip of another man, albeit fictional, refusing to be a Starbucks zombie.
He pulls it off considerably better than I ever could.
A true man after my own heart.
My wife brought my daughter to school today for a surprise visit, appearing about five minutes after the final bell had rung to end the school day.
I can’t tell you how much this reenergized me for the rest of the afternoon. A flying-leaping-death-defying hug from that little munchkin can completely change my outlook on life.
I recently read in the Harvard Business Review that Starbucks seeks to train its customers at nearly the same level as its employees. This is why a Starbucks cashier will convert my request for a medium coffee into a grande when passing the order onto the barista.
It’s not for the barista’s benefit (since everyone knows what a medium is). It’s to teach the customer to use the word grande next time. Starbucks hopes that engraining its culture into customers will increase brand loyalty. Use of the special Starbucks language is just one of the ways of doing this.
According to Starbucks, this type of training works on 95% of its customers. Only the most oppositional 5% of customers will reject this training entirely.
I am only a Starbucks customer in that I frequently purchase coffee for my wife and an occasional blueberry cake for myself.
But I am most assuredly in the oppositional 5%.
I can’t help it. I’m just jerky that way.
When trying to convince a friend who wants to lose weight that exercise (not diet) is the most important part of any weight loss plan, I explain that exercise initiates the most positive vicious circle that I know.
When you begin exercising, two things happen:
Your appetite goes down.
Your energy level increases.
I didn’t believe it when I started exercising on a daily basis, but it’s true.
The reduced appetite causes you to eat less and crave healthier food, so this unintentionally and almost unconsciously contributes to additional weight loss.
In many cases, regular exercise will be enough to initiate a significant change in diet.
At the same time, your energy level increases dramatically, which sounds counterintuitive but is nevertheless true. In addition, you sleep more soundly, meaning you are suddenly able to sleep less. This means that any time spent exercising is almost immediately recouped by a reduction in the overall amount of time spent in bed.
Can’t find the time to exercise? Start exercising. You will suddenly have the time.
Can’t reduce the number of calories consumed in a day? Start exercising and burning calories and you will eat less.
None of this sounds like it makes sense, and but’s true.
If you are looking to lose weight or (even better) simply improve your overall health, ignore dietary changes and start with exercise.
Initiate this positive, vicious circle.
Tonight I am grateful to time zones, which are usually a pain in the ass but have been a blessing to me as MEMOIRS OF AN IMAGINARY FRIEND begins publishing around the world.
Thanks to time zones, I can spend my early morning hours before work speaking to my editor and publicist in the UK and my evening hours answering questions on Australian radio.
I can spend the late afternoon exchanging emails with SEO experts in Uzbekistan and still have time to chat with my agent, who is on the west coast and is therefore still working even after I have finished dinner.
If everyone was operating on the same schedule, I don’t know how I’d ever get anything done. Time zones manage to spread my work throughout the day and night, which means I never really stop working, but it also means I can at least get the work done.
Have you ever seen a better breakfast?
One of the most important lessons I try to teach my students is the importance of admitting a mistake and possessing the moral integrity to apologize and make it right. Ask any one of my students, past or present, how I feel about mistakes, and they will tell you that the first, best and most important step in getting out of trouble with me is admitting to the error, apologizing for the action, and executing a course to correct the error and avoid repeating it again.
This is so hard for some students, and it is understandable. They are ten years old. Their egos are fragile. They have much to learn.
It is equally difficult for many adults, and this is a lot less understandable. I have watched colleagues, spouses, friends and relatives refuse to admit error and apologize, even when the person who they have so clearly wronged is someone they respect and love.
I have many, many faults. In fact, I once listed them in a post and added an addendum a few days later. I should probably update that list soon. But an inability to admit fault and apologize is not one of them. I am an expert at admitting that I was wrong. I am the king of culpability. I admit fault and apologize even when I am not quite certain that I did anything wrong.
I do not support the requested or demanded apology, for reasons outlined here (and possibly also because of my oppositional nature), but otherwise, I am an expert at both making mistakes and apologizing for them.
Admitting fault should not be difficult.
Apologizing should not be hard.
It is almost always the right thing, and yet for so many, it is so difficult.
Case in point:
The idiocy of Rick Santorum, who said this in regards to apologies yesterday:
GOP presidential candidate Rick Santorum on Sunday criticized President Obama for apologizing to Afghans this week for the burning of Qurans by NATO forces at a U.S. military base. “There was nothing deliberately done wrong here. This was something that happened as a mistake. Killing Americans in uniform is not a mistake,” Santorum said during ABC’s This Week. “Say it’s unfortunate … but to apologize for something that was not an intentional act is something that the president of the United States in my opinion should not have done ... I think it shows weakness.”
I had to read this three times, because I have listened to ten year old students say almost these exact words.
“Yes, I ran into her on the playground, but it was an accident. I didn’t mean to hurt her. So why should I say I’m sorry?”
Seriously. These are the kinds of things that my students say. Sadly, they are also the kinds of things less enlightened adults who wish to become leaders of the free world say.
I didn’t mean it.
I didn’t do it intentionally.
It was an accident.
It’s not as bad as what she did.
I shouldn’t have to apologize for an honest mistake.
These are the comments of a person with a weak mind.
I cannot believe that I live in a world in which politicians criticize leaders for apologizing for mistakes. I cannot believe I live in a world in which the willingness to apologize is considered a weakness to some.
I can only hope that my students were not listening to this nonsense. I can only hope they they were playing videogames or watching cartoons or playing with fire when Santorum was being stupid, because even videogames and cartoons and pyromania would be better than listening to this lunacy.
Every day I try to instill a foundation of moral integrity and a strong sense of self in my students. I try to teach them that the easiest way to forgiveness is through truth and sincerity. I try to make them understand that apologizing does not make you look weak. It demonstrates your strength of character.
Then an idiot like Rick Santorum comes along and tries to undo everything that I have tried so hard to teach my kids.
Someone please tell that man to shut the hell up.
